Tis the season to be thrifty!

So thankful for the salvation army thrift store a block away from our house! Since we are not in our usual home for Christmas and we are shortly returning back to Australia I do not have much in the way of Christmas decorations etc. I want to make it a special time and fun for the kids, but I don't want to spend a lot of money or buy things I am only going to have to get rid of...

So I head to the thrift store (they don't call them 'op shops' here) I picked up the cutest mini Christmas tree there. It came complete with little gold apples and gold angels and lights!! I also got a bunch of little red apple decorations (loving the apple theme!) some silver tinsel a set of icicle lights that now hang over our back window, a wreath, ribbon and a heap of christmas themed tins that I will be using to fill with home made goodies to give as gifts! I must have spend a total of about $25 on all this stuff. The item I am most excited about though (after the tree) is the CDs I picked up.

I found a WOW (Christian Christmas Music) compilation for $1!!!! Not only is it a double disc of great songs (for the most part), but its a 2011 album! I don't think it had ever been used! My tradition dictates that I commence the playing of Christmas music on November first and absolutely THRASH whatever happens to be my favourite Christmas CD of the year. The last couple of years the sound system has been dominated with the crooning of Mac Powell from Third Day's album "Christmas Offerings" and now I have a new one! Woo yeah! Feeling pretty merry about this, can you tell?!

Anyway, my point is. You really don't have to spend a truck load of money to get into the Christmas vibe. I have also decorated the house with home-made glittered snowflakes that are stringed up around the place, and stuck to the window. Another cheap and fun idea is to get the kids to draw christmas pictures and then stick them over any photo frames that are around the house, preferably large ones! It works for us particularly since we aren't in our own house and some of the kids pictures up around the place makes it a little more personal.

What about you? Any good, easy, inexpensive ideas for doing some Christmas decorating around the place? Love to hear them.

Back to the thrift stores though, another idea to think about at Christmas time-Last year, our family decided that since we were becoming so large, with all the kids being born and all, and since we aren't quite ready to give up present receiving ourselves :) we would have a 'no store-bought gifts' policy. The deal was, you had to either find a present second-hand or make something yourself! I think this was such an awesome idea as the presents were creative and heartfelt and at times, hilarious. It was a great way to bless each other and have fun without a lot of money being spent. The idea was also to use some of that extra cash to give away to those in need. Cool huh?

I am really excited about the whole thrift store thing. I was into it as a teenager but I can see it becoming a full blown obsession! I have moved beyond just clothes shopping as I scour everything from books and magazines, to linens, kitchenware and of course decorations! I find it such a thrill to search in all those 'unwanted' things to find something of value to me or someone else, and to do so at a fraction of the cost of something new...It may take a little more time and you may take more home than you intended too... But its a great way to support the community and learn to be more wise in your spending. It's so easy to rush out and buy new things but I hope you feel a little inspired to check out the local op shop/thrift store and see what treasures you can uncover!

Ok, so I guess I am still buying things I am going to have to get rid of, but hey I know a place that is happy to take on unwanted goods! And the other good news this Christmas is that we have a Saviour who came to earth to give those who feel like 'unwanted goods' new life! (how's that for a tie-in?!)

I want to get away

Oh dear me. Sometimes I feel like a failure. Some days I feel I am not up to the job. The thought of another 9 hours of daylight is too much to take. Just let me hide. Just let me escape for a few hours of uninterrupted self-indulgent bliss.

You could read my blog and see my photos on Facebook and mistakenly believe life is like the photo filter I put on most of my pictures 'magic hour'. Oh no, believe me its not. Today is one of those days, and inexplicably so. Its hard to pick what makes one day seem amazing and one far from it. I don't see all that is going on behind the scenes. But today I just feel like getting away.

Right now I have. I have a 2 hour leave pass from home. I have escaped to the comforts of McDonalds, where the hot chocolate is cheap and the Wi-Fi flows freely. I kinda feel bad. I feel bad that I just wanted to run away. Should I stay and 'hack it' through one of those days where I feel like I am more likely to lose my temper with my children than embrace those 'character developing' moments? I don't know. But I am grateful for the way of escape.

I have those other moments regularly too, where I feel the strength of God's Spirit flowing through my bones, empowering me to do all those little things with joy that could be so mundane. That causes me to truly delight in my children and enjoy them. Even when they are being difficult. Those days I feel like I can do all that and more; take on the world, pray up a storm, take on the devil himself and intimidate him into submission by my sheer Joie-de-vivre! Ha!

But not today! Today I am a meek little mouse, ready to burst into tears at the slightest reproach, where the thought of cleaning the kitchen, one more time, seems an insurmountable task. Where I would rather run away than stand and fight.

What I hold onto in days like these is that I get to go to sleep tonight and it will be over! Truly. His mercies are new every morning. On days like these I remind myself 'I am not able on my own' (actually listening to a great song by NEEDTOBREATHE with those very words!) as I come face to face with my weakness AGAIN, it reminds me that each day I need to begin by coming to my knees before him (which I failed to do today) and say from the core of my being 'HELP ME! I NEED YOU DESPERETELY!'

He gives grace to the humble, and surely it does take humility to get down on your face and admit that the task of feeding, clothing and looking after your children is a task beyond your self. But it is the truth. We cannot be the mothers we were made to be without the help of the one who created us and formed those very children in our wombs. He knit them together in us. He knit us together, and only he can continue to knit into our very beings all the things we need to not only survive another day, but to THRIVE in it.

It is possible. I have experienced it. Though today is yet another reminder of how much I need supernatural help. My heart surges with gratefulness that help is exactly what is on offer. In the very moments I need it most. In the middle of a nappy change, a sink full of dishes, a tantrum (yours or your childs!) call to him and just see if he won't give grace to you when you ask for it.

Maybe my grace in this moment is the escape afforded me by a generous and kind husband, who likewise understands my weakness and my need for time to piece together my peace of mind. BUt God is there, in the way you most need him and often least expect him, he is loving you and caring for you every minute of your life.

Call to him while he is near.

Perfect Love

Perfect love casts out fear.

I don't know if you have heard this statement before. But it's true. These five words come to mind a lot lately. In many different contexts I find it's a truth that penetrates and challenges me to the core. God has not been welcomed in to those deep places, where doubts and fears still linger and lie.

There's this irrational part of my heart that seems to believe that the moment I totally surrender everything to God, he will take something I love away. More to the point- SOMEONE.

They say becoming a mother is like giving your heart legs and letting it go walk around the world. It's scary because something could happen to that precious little child- and I don't know if my heart could recover.

So we mothers fret and fear and come up with all sorts of strategies to keep these little ones safe. That's good, thats our job, let's minimise the risks. But there is that tendency to shield too much, to obsess and to control.

So many times when Shane takes the kids somewhere, to the park, for a walk, a bike ride. I think about the risks, I make suggestions towards everyone's safety. I fear. I imagine something happening... the unthinkable. Why do these fears haunt me so? I constantly battle fears. I know from the outside I appear as probably about as relaxed and easy going and un-fretful as mothers pretty much get. But I struggle all the time, I have these thoughts, these fears; but I keep them in check. I pray. I let go. I trust... Most of the time.

I know perfect love casts out fear. I want that perfect love. I want to know God's love so deeply, so fully so completely that the fears that lurk in the deepest recesses of my doubts will melt in the heat of his unshakeable love.

But I know that trusting in his love doesn't guarantee a life free from pain and loss, no. Jesus actually PROMISED that we would have trouble!

He said; 'in this world you WILL have trouble',

well, great! Thanks for that revelation...tell me something I DIDN'T know! Well, here it is...

'take heart, I have overcome the world!'

I don't think we fully comprehend this statement or what Jesus did to prove it was so. He literally faced, head on, what would be the greatest fear of any individual or parent. He died a brutal death, though innocent- but which is worse? To die that death, or to be the father watching your son die? God the father and God the son faced our greatest fears for us. Not so we would never face troubles of our own, but so that they could OVERCOME the worst possible outcome for us. Thereby freeing us from the fear of death. The sting is gone. Yes we die. But we have the hope of eternal life! yes there is pain in this life, But thanks to Jesus we have healing too! Love and Life and Healing are more potent than hatred, death and destruction. Most importantly he promised he would always be with us. He will never forsake us, even if others do.

You see! God has the final word! Though so often in this life it looks like the good suffer the most. Injustice abounds. But ITS NOT OVER YET, and he gives us hope in this life. As we trust in a love so powerful that the creator of universes was embodied in flesh, to know what it is like to be limited to a human body, to feel pain, to be betrayed, to suffer loss. What an amazing God, that loved us so much he became one of us!

As I grow to know and love and trust my God and Saviour I find my heart is filled with his love more and more. The fears that held a tight grip on my heart are loosening with each truth that I embrace. This is true freedom; You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free...

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son. that whosoever shall believe in him, will not perish but have everlasting life" John 3:16.

I hope you take him at his word, as I have and am learning to do so more, day by day.

Jet-Lagged Love

I love weddings. I love watching two people in love, so excited to start a life together. It's all so new, exciting, the beginning of a new family. I love that its not me! Ha!

I would not want to go back in time and learn again the hard lessons that have brought me (and us) to the place we are now. 7 years of marriage baby! We celebrated on July 3 our anniversary. I look back and smile condescendingly on the younger Christy. She was so eager to be married, so excited about the idea of loving another person more than herself. About sacrificing her own will for his. Giving, loving, caring...Yay! Ok, I know this is beginning to sound a tad sarcastic, but bear with me.

On your wedding day the idea of living out 1 Corinthians 13 (THE marriage chapter, it would seem) 'love is patient, love is kind, it is not proud, it does not boast, it does not envy, always hopes, always trusts, always perseveres...' is so appealing! Wow, that is beautiful, poetic, romantic, PERFECT.

That's right, it is PERFECT. However, the number one thing that marriage has taught me thus far is how NOT perfect I am!

What I have discovered is that, it is one thing to love someone when it is lovely, and convenient and mutually beneficial e.g. make a cup of tea for you and him so you can sit down together and enjoy one another's delightful company, or forgive him for running half hour late; 'its ok, honey, I just got caught up on my emails while I waited for you'.

But doing things out of love for a person when it costs you personally. When you have to sacrifice for it. When giving to them doesn't just mean not having something yourself but having something BAD! That, my friend, is where the rubber hits the road. That is what marriage is all about. Let the refining begin.

Take this morning for example. My husband and I are both jet-lagged from travelling across the globe with three small children (crazy? yes!). The last few nights have been somewhat nightmarish (although a nightmare would mean we were actually sleeping...bonus) in the crazy tag-team way the kids wake-ups have been seemingly orchestrated to try and destroy their parents' sanity (they have come narrowly close to succeeding in their mission). Anyhoo, lets just say I REALLY would like to sleep in this morning, and I am really hoping my husband is going to feel overwhelmed with love and the desire to sacrificial bless his wife by getting up with the baby, so she can get the beauty sleep she clearly needs.

I wait.

The baby cries.

I pretend I am asleep. I know I can out-wait him. If he wakes up properly he usually can't go back to sleep...This is what I am hoping for.

Then I hear it. The death knell for my sleep in;

"Can you get up with him please?" I don't think I can flatly refuse his sincere (and needed) request. Oh man, if he had just left it to non-verbal cues I might have won this one. But no. He cut to the chase. I must say yes. It's only right. But everything in me screams for my sleep in!! ITS NOT FAIR! I NEED THIS MORE! I HAVE BEEN THE LAST TO BED EVERY NIGHT! I WAKE UP WITH THE BABY! I.... am so damn selfish! (not usually one to swear, I do think its appropriate as selfishness is to be damned)

So, I reluctantly rise from beneath the covers. Stand like a zombie. Barely able to focus on my crying child. Maybe I will faint from exhaustion? Then he will feel sorry for me!...No luck.

I can force myself to get up, but I can't force my mouth to stay shut! (the tongue is a restless evil, who can tame it?)

"I REALLY DON'T WANT TO" I say angrily as I depart the room, baby in arms.

Wow, that was insightful. Who would've known?! Christy doesn't want to get up in the morning?? In our years of marriage that is certainly something that Shane has learnt and needs no reminding.

My sin nature seemed to slowly simmer down as I became fully conscious. Once awake and enjoying the morning I reflected a little more accurately on reality; as opposed to my sleep induced huff of self-pity. I felt so unfairly treated, to be the one to get up, but the truth was Shane really did need the sleep more than I did. After resettling Hudson at 1:30am, (so I didn't need to), he was wide awake (thanks jet-lag) and couldn't get back to sleep til about 3 or 4am, much to his frustration. Also the previous morning he had gotten up at some ridiculous hour like 5am, taken Hudson for a walk and let me sleep in til well after 9. What part of me thought that it was MORE fair for me to sleep in than him? The selfish part! It clearly has to go!

Sigh... Why isn't it enough? Why do I always want more? I wish I didn't like sleeping so much, that it was easier to get up. That I could jump out of bed and say 'sleep in all day if you like, I will see to the kids, the cooking, the cleaning, the shopping.' But I don't. I struggle to truly give and not demand in return. To love generously, unselfishly, not looking for how things will benefit me. It's easy to focus on the things I feel I am missing out on and fail to see how outrageously blessed I am.

I am grateful to have a husband who loves me, even though he sees me for the selfish, grumpy person I am a lot of the time. He makes me want to be a better wife and mum. He is not perfect, nor should I expect him to be (though gosh, he is pretty close sometimes and good looking to boot!). None of us can fulfill 1 Corinthians 13, no matter how great our desire to is on our wedding day. It is an impossible standard that requires the God of impossibility to fulfill. He wants to empower us to live out his word, his truth and his love and HE CAN, because he is everything we are not and he leads us and loves us PERFECTLY by his example.

I know there is nothing in myself that can make me better, that can change my heart to be loving. But I know the God of love will bring to completion the good work he is doing in me. HE is refining me, oh how I need it!

Overwhelmed

One of my main hurdles in tackling the daily housework is the mental one. You know when you assess the state of the kitchen /bedroom /bathroom /laundry etc and go; 'Oh man, thats going to take a lot of time and effort and I just don't think I have what it takes-mentally /emotionally /time wise to handle it'. I put it in the too hard basket (which tends to get pretty full, pretty quick) and try and find something less challenging to get me into the swing of things. Does this sound familiar?

It's interesting the things we demand of our children which we struggle with ourselves. After responding in retreat to the housework I can easily find myself turning around and demanding that the girls 'clean up this mess you made!' It's rather hypocritical of me to take this approach of high and mighty house-keeping, demanding my minions get it together and begin to carry their weight. Hmmm. It's so easy to shout commands because it's what they should be doing; 'Just do it! come on! you made this mess you can clean it up'!

I think I need to start this dialogue with myself. Maybe, if I save the lectures for me, actually listen to them and lead by example, perhaps that would be a more effective parenting style as I seek to train them in taking responsibility and work ethic. Oh Lord why does it have to be so hard?! It would be so much easier if I just asked them to do something, they did it, end of story. However I sense God has a bigger picture in mind. While I teach my children how to be grown up, he is teaching me (or trying to) the same. It must all be rather amusing for him some days.

A few days back, as I was re-ordering the chaos of our, once again, out-of-control bedroom, I requested that Esther begin doing the same in her room. I came in to check on her a little while later. No progress. I was feeling somewhat irritated by this fact but decided to change my approach. Instead of ranting and raving, demanding and whining that she begin taking action. I realised she is just like me. She is looking at her chaotic room and feeling overwhelmed. She doesn't need someone to say 'clean it!'. Just like me, she knows what she is meant to be doing but she feels overwhelmed and doesn't know where to start. she needs what I need- help. I knelt down beside her and talked to her honestly.

'I know it's very messy and it feels too hard right?' She nodded, 'Mummy feels like this too sometimes. It looks like too much for one person to do, it's overwhelming right? You know what we need to do? Just start with one thing. Put one thing away and then one other thing away. How about you just put away four things, that's doable right? Just get started. That's what I did. It's called a strategy and we need strategies to tackle big problems. Ok?'

She smiled shyly when she heard me confess how hard I found it and the smile broadened as she caught on to the idea of just starting small. 'I am going to put away ten things!!' she declared triumphantly and began doing just that. When she had done ten, invigorated by success she just kept going until it was all clean! Miraculous!

This interaction and its successful outcome really encouraged me that my weaknesses can be their strength. We all need help and strategies to tackle those areas that we have mental blocks to, whether they seem big or small to others. I know God is there to help me in this way. I need to remember my children are the same. I might think something is a 'small ask' from my perspective but it might appear large and overwhelming to them. I need to share with them how to draw upon the strength of our heavenly father and not rely on our own resources. He is never overwhelmed and always ready to lend his strength to ours, transforming our weakness for his glory.

You're All My Favourites!

It's just not right.

God surely doesn't love THEM as much as he loves ME!?!

As a child I really struggled with this concept... (Let's be honest, I still do!) At times it would flip the other way depending on which 'them' is in my thoughts at the time. Does God really love me as much as he (clearly) loves them?

It does baffle the mind to try and comprehend the love of our heavenly Father. But as he reminds us in scripture 'My ways are higher than your ways'. Talk about a major understatement! It's rather laughable that he even needs to remind us of this, but of course, he most definitely does. I am God, you are not, of course I am going to think differently, bigger and better than you do! But he is so patient with us, he must be amused at times, at our arrogance, our grappling to understand and compare his love to ours.

We are so insecure. We fret and fear of being forgotten and unloved, when a close friend shows devotion to another we get jealous, we wonder if we will be needed, will we be demoted to 'second best friend' ?!? (horrors!) We are guarded with our love. There seems to be a limited amount and it must be meted out carefully, only to the best and most worthy. We shrink back in an emotional retreat, hugging our wounded hearts to ourselves once more, determined to be more careful next time. We have close friends, friends, acquaintences, enemies... We only have so much time in one day, time must be used and given wisely...to the worthy.

It's hard to comprehend a love that is exceedingly generous, self-less even unto death, unafraid! Perfect love casts out fear. Wow. What a promise, what a picture of true love; Fearlessness. No more fear of rejection, fear of hurt, fear of loss. Only Love. Death swallowed up in victory. It is a glorious thought. It is a glorious reality. And yet, we live in a limbo between the now and the what is to be, hungering for a greater revelation of what it truly means to be the 'sons of God'. Carriers of his love, fearless.

Ephesians 3 intrigues me. As Paul prays for those believers in Ephesus, he clearly had a glimpse of something wonderful. He prayed for the impossible. That they (and we) might have the strength to comprehend, the love of Christ, how high, how wide, how deep and how long it is. To KNOW this love, though it surpasses knowledge! It must be possible then, to know this impossible love, but I have a sense it is not something we can know in our heads, but in our hearts. And filled with his love what wonders we could do for him...

But it seems God had favourites, didn't he? Daniel was called a 'friend' of God and John, his disciple 'his beloved'. What's that about? Is this allowed? Doesn't he love us all the same and not play favourites?

I think being a parent has brought me a lot of insight into this dynamic. I worried with being pregnant with my second child, was it really possible to love this next one as much as I did my precious Esther? It seemed too hard to comprehend. When she was born, I did FEEL differently about her than I did to Esther, but it certainly wasn't less love. It was just...Different. A few weeks after her birth as Charlotte was settling to sleep in the next room and Shane and I were alone in the living room I remember saying to him 'I'm so glad we have Charlotte' and Shane wholeheartedly agreed. Our totally unique, completely irreplaceable, adorable and hilarious Charlotte. I now have three children, each is unique, and with each I have a unique connection with. You can't compare them, you can't replace them, what they bring to the world and what they bring out in me as their mother, is utterly unique and precious.

I know this to be true of friendships also. Although you can move states, or countries and discover new friends and community, they are utterly unique. What one friend brings out in you, the connection you have, the way your two completely original personalities react to one another can never be duplicated in another friendship. So we never need to fear being replaced, we never have to compete or try to be different than what we are. What we each bring to this world is so precious and so rare, we are each valuable because there is only ONE of each of us!

I do believe this is how God feels about us, he made us all and his desire is to have a relationship with each of those that he has 'created in his own image'. God desires to know me and love me and have an intimate friendship with me because I am the only ME that he has made! I bring out something in him that no other human he has made can. I don't have to worry about whether he loves me more or less than anyone else because in a way, I am the only one there is...of me!

Since God is so big and his love so expansive he is capable of this on a grand scale! However I struggle to love well and fearlessly in my human setting of marriage, friendships and relationships; they are all beset with fear and insecurity, doubt and confusion! It is encouraging when I look up to him and see his fearless, expansive, generous heart lavishing on me more love than I can comprehend with my finite mind! It is this love that empowers me to love others. We love because he has first loved us.

The truth is, like the cute picture book I read to my girls You're All My Favourites by Sam McBratney. We are all his favourites too. We think having favourites means exclusion but God is all about glorious INCLUSION to whoever will open their heart back up to the one who has loved them so deeply. While he may call some like, Daniel and John his 'beloved friends' it is not because he has rejected the others, but that the others have rejected him. His door is always open to us, he beckons us to 'draw near to me and I will draw near to you' (James 4:8), his hand is outstretched, will you offer him yours?

Jesus may still be your enemy, perhaps an acquaintance or even a friend, but he longs to be your favourite- as you are his.

Live within your limits

Psalm 16: 5-11

Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup;

you make my lot secure.

The boundary lines have fallen for me in

pleasant places;

surely I have a delightful inheritance.

I will praise the Lord, who counsels me;

even at night my heart instructs me.

I keep my eyes always on the Lord.

with him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;

my body also will rest secure,

because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead,

nor will you let your faithful one see decay.

You make known to me the path of life;

you will fill me with joy in your presence,

with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

What a beautiful Psalm full of glorious promises! I love verse six especially; "the boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places''. How often do we express thankfulness for the boundaries in our lives, the limitations? I would think, not often! It almost seems a strange thing to be thankful for. More often we yearn for release from the limitations we experience and desire to see what life is like 'on the other side' the classic, grass is greener mentality.

The thing is; whatever we are doing, whatever season of life we are in currently, it means we are unable to do or be something else because of it. For example; if we are single, we can't experience what it is like to be married at the same time (actually lots of people do, and things become very messy, but that is another post!), If we are working full time, we can't study full time, if we are living in Europe we can't live in Australia. It seems obvious doesn't it? Certain choices we make, or situations we live in, are going to make other choices and situations impossible or prohibited. In my observation we, as people, seem to chafe at these kinds of restrictions, as common sense as they are. Always wanting what we can't have, always desiring the forbidden.

It's not necessarily that we desire things that are bad in themselves, just bad timing. I find this idea is very pertinent to motherhood. Choosing to be a wife and mother as I have, choosing to stay at home to raise three small children means that there are a great number of things I cannot do because of it. I cannot sleep whenever I want to or read a book whenever I want to. There are masses of chores constantly needing to be done; basically sapping up any spare time and energy that there might be to do anything else. By the time bed time rolls around, I don't really want to do much other than loll about on the couch.

Sigh. Woe is me. If only I had more free time, oh what wonderful things I would do. I could write in peace, bake uninterrupted, do some cleaning and organising at my own pace without someone undoing everything I did. I could pop out at any time to go to the shops or go out for coffee. I could study, or get a job where my skills would be valued and honed. I could take a little nap and not wake up to someone crying or wanting something from me. The list of what I COULD do without children could really go on and on.

The thing is. If I had more free time (i.e. no kids) what is it that I would REALLY be doing that is so great? When I stop and think about it, in those moments when I imagine that I would be so productive without the kiddies, I know that I am fooling myself. If I didnt have kids I would be much less productive than I am now. I would waste time and procrastinate, become more lazy and probably depressed.

You know what? Being a Mum is the BEST thing for me. It is what the Lord has ordained for my life and he is working through me not only to love these precious children, but to conform me into his image more and more. For me, there is no better way he could do this than by being a wife and mum. I have been blessed with this season, these limitations, these boundaries. And I AM grateful for them. I am so glad I don't have all that free time to 'do whatever I want' because frankly, that doesn't really exist anyway! The enemy would like us to believe that there is some perfect state of being beyond what we are called to do in this moment. As long as we are striving and longing for that elusive 'something else', we will continue to lose the moment we are in.

I love having kids, even if I am woken up six times a night. They are alive. I can care for them. It is a beautiful thing. I know God will continue to empower me to do this task and I believe he will continue to enlarge my capacity to do more, even in this season with children. But I want to do things as he calls me to them, not in my own strength or timing.

I am thankful for this life. My calling to live as his daughter, to love those entrusted to my care wholeheartedly and with JOY! Imagine that?! Being joyful! Hey Mums, next time you are at playgroup or chatting with another mum somewhere, why not talk about the things you LOVE most about being a mum rather than the most frustrating event that has happened in the past 24 hours?! We are all guilty of this, for some reason we think that is what people want to hear about. Seriously, we don't! Of course we all need to have space to share the tough things, but how about sharing the joy and fun that also comes in every 24 hour period of being a mum?

Why focus on the negatives when there is so much to be thankful for? Your limitations and your boundaries aren't there to burden you, they are there to help you live life to the full! Be thankful today for what you cannot do because it means you can wholeheartedly enjoy that which you CAN!

Wake up!

"But make sure that you don't get so absorbed and exhausted in taking care of all your day-by-day obligations that you lose track of the time and doze off, oblivious to God. The night is about over, dawn is about to break. Be up and awake to what God is doing!"

I struggle to wake up in the morning. It seems that gravity is twice as strong for me as I try, half-heartedly, to pull myself out of a deep slumber. In those moments I feel there is nothing in life I want more than some more sleep. To curl back up under those oh-so-cosy blankets, snuggle in and just sleep! I suppose having children and often multiple wake ups during the night would increase my desire and at times, legitimate need for more sleep. But to be honest I have always been like this. My body craves sleep. I think I could easily sleep til midday every day of the week, regardless of how late or early I went to bed the night before. Of course this is out of the question, mostly because it is not practically possible, but also, in my fully awake moments I truly dont want to sleep that much!

I desire to be an 'early morning person', up at the crack of dawn with enthusiasm and joy. Ready to greet a new day, spend time in the word, a piping hot drink and a quiet breakfast before the house awakens. It sounds like utter bliss! At least it does the night before...Sleep dissolves all my resolve as the following day my determination has been swallowed up by the overwhelming desire to sleep, in those moments it is all I care about. ARgh! the battle goes on.

Parallel to this physical battle I seem to daily face with sleep, is the spiritual one. I long to be more consistent. To daily take up my cross and follow him. To be fully awake to the things of God. To have my eyes on him, prayerful, looking for opportunities to love and bless others. Aware of the spiritual battles so that I pray rather than try to work out solutions with my own logic and limited understanding. Most of the time I think I am in a sleepy state spiritually, and a little agitated when someone or something begins to prod me out of my complacency to look up and see the urgency surrounding me. "The signs of the times" are screaming at us that this is not an hour to be slumbering, self-absorbed and comfortable. What will it take for us to become fully awake and responsive to God.

I think of the poor folk in NZ. Wow. Going about daily tasks, unaware that suddenly the world would come crashing down-literally. Likewise, spiritually we can wander around like sleeping zombies totally unaware of what is about to 'go down' around us and that God has a role for us to play in his purposes. He wants ambassadors, children who are tuned in to his Spirit, ready to act on his behalf. Daily submitting their lives to him, repenting for selfishness and asking him to again crucify our flesh so that we might become more obedient to him, to be USEFUL to him.

We are so stubborn and thick headed! We just want to do what we want, when we want to! Like me each morning; my flesh screams at me to let me let it sleep. It also wants me to switch off and tune out, become absorbed in the little things in life, my desires and wants... Keep the noise going so that I fail to hear the still small voice calling me, drawing me to something higher and better.

The good news is; we have the spirit of him who raised Christ Jesus inside of us! (Rom 8) We are not alone in this battle, we cant win it without him, but with him victory is certain! I praise God because he is winning the battle over my flesh. Slowly but surely I look to him more, turn to him, tune him in, allow him to love me and reveal himself to me...and...wow...life is incredible. I can't put into words the joy and excitment growing in me as I let him in more and more. Becoming what he called me to be, seeing things I havent seen before...dreaming dreams... Knowing the father's love. He has an abundant life for us. And its not just talk.

I want to challenge other christians out there, who like me, maybe you grew up in the church and feel like you have 'heard it all', there is little that is new and exciting in your faith. The tangible presence of his Spirit is not something you have felt or at least not lately. Oh there is so much more to come! Draw near to God and HE WILL draw near to you (James 4). We DO have to take a step towards him, to call out to him, ask for help, ask for revelation. But seek and you will find, ask and it WILL be given, knock and the door will be opened! These are promises we can depend on, but to receive them we need to take a step out and simply...Ask.

Whatever our current role and obligations in life; for me, its being a wife and mum, God can and will work through that to fulfill his purposes in us and bring us closer to him, bring blessing to others. Don't limit God to how you think he works and what that looks like. Simply come to him with your empty cup and ask him to fill it...watch and be amazed.

It's time to wake-up, the time for sleeping has past. We need to be fully awake, fully alive to God and be ready so that we are not taken by suprise when he returns for us, his bride.

WAKE UP!