So you think this blog is going to be about corporal punishment and the pros and cons of this culturally sensitive debate? Well, you are wrong. What I wish to share with you today is the violent predecession of the untamed toddler heart, namely, Esther Rayner. Ok, I am not going to lie to you or make it sound better than it is. Esther hits other kids. There I said it! Sometimes I even think she enjoys it. Shocking, I know. I don't think there is anything much more distressing than to see your child inflict acts of harm on others. It flies in the face of all that I desire for her. She is acting out exactly the opposite to my wishes. It is upsetting, it is frustrating and it is challenging! I know how the other mums must be feeling because I know how I feel when Esther is the victim. It doesn't take long for a kid to get in the bad books, or not be wanted because of his behaviour and I am very sensitive to this fact. It is unavoidable, nobody wants to hang out with you if your child is going to hurt their child. So I feel the intense pressure to hurry Esther out of this 'phase' ASAP!
The last couple of weeks I have been watching her like a hawk whenever we are with other little kids, at times even sacrificing my catch up time with friends to go and 'play' (aka supervise Esther) with the kiddes to make sure all goes smoothly. I have really been feeling stressed about this. At play group two weeks ago I believe Esther hit EVERYONE at playgroup, at least once. ARGH! I was feeling pretty tense that morning. As I put Esther in the high chair for the fifth 'time out' that morning I assured everyone that I was starting a toddler course the following week. Talk about embaressing.
I have been having lots of talks with Esther as we drive places on our way to see friends. I talk about being kind and not hitting, being gentle, sharing, coming to mummy if you need help etc. She repeats back a lot of it and it seems like she is understanding. Yet when she is in a situation and something isn't going her way- watch out! Just when I start to wonder if we can ever go out in public again I begin to see some glimmers of hope. On Friday we had Zoe Giltinan over for the day and there were no angry outbursts. As we were driving Zoe home she exclaimed cheerfully at the sudden realisation 'Esther doesn't hit me anymore!' What lovely encouragement, and how sweet that 3 year olds are so forgiving. I wondered if our 'talks' with Esther were finally paying off as that morning before Zoe arrived, I told Esther she was coming over to play. Esther immediately responded with; 'Don't hit peoples' and followed it up with the more specific 'Don't hit Giltinans'. Yes, I couldn't agree more. And I am praying that we have turned a corner and the worst is over. Hoping our vigilance is paying off in this area. For anyone reading this and your child is going through something similar-I feel your pain!
The last couple of weeks I have been watching her like a hawk whenever we are with other little kids, at times even sacrificing my catch up time with friends to go and 'play' (aka supervise Esther) with the kiddes to make sure all goes smoothly. I have really been feeling stressed about this. At play group two weeks ago I believe Esther hit EVERYONE at playgroup, at least once. ARGH! I was feeling pretty tense that morning. As I put Esther in the high chair for the fifth 'time out' that morning I assured everyone that I was starting a toddler course the following week. Talk about embaressing.
I have been having lots of talks with Esther as we drive places on our way to see friends. I talk about being kind and not hitting, being gentle, sharing, coming to mummy if you need help etc. She repeats back a lot of it and it seems like she is understanding. Yet when she is in a situation and something isn't going her way- watch out! Just when I start to wonder if we can ever go out in public again I begin to see some glimmers of hope. On Friday we had Zoe Giltinan over for the day and there were no angry outbursts. As we were driving Zoe home she exclaimed cheerfully at the sudden realisation 'Esther doesn't hit me anymore!' What lovely encouragement, and how sweet that 3 year olds are so forgiving. I wondered if our 'talks' with Esther were finally paying off as that morning before Zoe arrived, I told Esther she was coming over to play. Esther immediately responded with; 'Don't hit peoples' and followed it up with the more specific 'Don't hit Giltinans'. Yes, I couldn't agree more. And I am praying that we have turned a corner and the worst is over. Hoping our vigilance is paying off in this area. For anyone reading this and your child is going through something similar-I feel your pain!
